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My excessive energy, extreme narcissism, and intense love of neon-colored spandex is both managed and fueled by my addiction to fitness. I push myself to extremes and I push other people's buttons. Obviously I needed my own blog.

Thursday, August 31, 2017

August 2017 Goals

Hi friends! I'm back! I've found it pretty difficult to blog all summer. I've been struggling, and sometimes I hesitate to write about it because it feels like I'm airy dirty laundry. Work has been hard. I got an awesome promotion that recognized the hard work that I have been doing, including the additional responsibilities I've taken on since a colleague left in June 2016. But more money and a new title didn't add any hours to my week. I try to keep things in perspective but I broke down and cried on Tuesday. My team is so understaffed and my right-hand woman works remotely from Houston. Her house is destroyed by Hurricane Harvey. I am so thankful that she and her family are safe, but she's offline for the foreseeable future. That's 25 hours of work a week that's back on me. I'm trying to get temps in but that's a whole extra level of stress when I work remotely from Atlanta and the temp agency is in New York.

The travel is killing my personal budget because I'm spending so much money on dog boarding. I don't want to go anywhere for personal travel when I rarely get to enjoy a day off in Atlanta. That being said, I just got back from some trips that were pretty great. I had a really great birthday in Charleston. My Mikes planned me the best weekend where we ate all the food and drank all of the rosé. I got to see the eclipse in totality and a special someone threw me the best space themed birthday party.

Eclipse Margarita

Spaceship Birthday Cake

The best birthday ever.

I've felt so far away from the Lord this summer that I just stopped showing up to church. That was stupid of me. I started reading my daily devotional again and now I talk out loud to Jesus. I work alone from my apartment, so I have the benefit that only my dogs might think I'm crazy. I feel better today than I have in a long time, and knowing Jesus is with me always is the reason.

But yeah, this summer has been rough. I haven't been motivated to work out. I go and I enjoy being there but I haven't looked forward to going. I am excited to enter September with a renewed focus on my personal and professional goals, including enjoying exercise.

Fitness and Nutrition

CrossFit Goal: 110/200 WODs. I did 13 WODs this month. I dropped in at CrossFit Jolt in Lambertville, NJ. We were staying just across the state line in New Hope, PA for a wedding.

Not CrossFit: I ran 4 miles.

Macro Tracking: I hit my macros like a boss and then went on Vacation Mode (it's a setting in Avatar) on August 18. I got back on Monday and started tracking Tuesday. I've got new macros and they are harder to hit because I have less protein. I have been trying to hit high protein numbers for two years, finally got good at it, and now I'm trying to not go over!

Water: I'm probably drinking too much iced coffee and Diet Coke, but I have 3 water bottles in rotation and I drink all of them. I really enjoy squeezing Meyer lemon in my water.


Church: I went once.

Call a Friend: Man, I am so sick of the phone. My entire relationship is conducted over the phone across weird timezones. All of the stuff I shared above has not been good for my relationship. It's hard when someone calls you and you can either lie and say everything is great, or you can catch them up to speed on how you feel like you are drowning. Hi honey! Can you figure out how to clone me or double the number of hours in a day?! When the pilot is home, I am working. When the pilot is working, I am working, unless it's the weekend and then he's working and I'm probably working or stressed out about not working. Keeping track of his schedule and my travel schedule feels like work. I feel like I'm harping just to find a day when we will both be free.

Dating long distance is difficult. Dating when there's a lot of work travel is difficult. Dating when one person is a planner and the other person wants spontaneity is difficult. I was so busy congratulating myself for being girlfriend of the year for all of the crap that I put up with that I didn't realize I had started to feel and then show resentment. There's been some big arguments recently. Fortunately we were able to have a nice time at my friend Lauren's wedding and a lovely weekend in Oyster Bay with my parents.

Someone told me my dress reminded him of a Disney Princess. BEST. COMPLIMENT. EVER.

And so tonight, I end the month of August grateful for another year, but really looking forward to making some big changes. I need to hire a full-time coordinator so that I can stay home and focus on doing the important strategic work my job requires. I need to get out in nature with my dogs. I need to be confident that I will still be invited to future events when I tell friends I'm not available to do something. I need Jesus. And I need a vacation from being my relationship project manager. I want to make more time for blogging because it makes me happy. I enjoy writing about my life and sharing it with the world. It's something that is important to me.

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