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My excessive energy, extreme narcissism, and intense love of neon-colored spandex is both managed and fueled by my addiction to fitness. I push myself to extremes and I push other people's buttons. Obviously I needed my own blog.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

10 Things I Learned in 2010

1. Cigarettes are not a substitute for food. Well actually they are, but I have to keep reminding myself that I don't smoke anymore. In 2011 I will stop claiming smoking doesn't count when I am drunk. In 2011 I will stop claiming a lot of things don't count when I am drunk.

2. A serving of peanut butter is 2 tablespoons. Two tablespoons of peanut butter barely covers a quarter of an apple in my book. That's why I like to eat 4 tablespoons of Better'n Peanut Butter instead.

3. It is completely possible to gain 10 lbs in 2 weeks. Sadly, it is extremely difficult to lose 10 lbs in 2 weeks. This may be the definition of irony.

4. You should never drink until 4am the night (morning) before a 10K. Some people might find this obvious. I, however, did not.

5. The calorie counters on cardio machines grossly overcalculate the number of calories burned. Buy a heart rate monitor.

6. Do not agree to date a person that compliments your form in spin class. You will have to change gym locations.

7. Gyms do not clean yoga mats daily. Scabies can be transmitted through yoga mats. Once your skin stops crawling, you should go out and buy a mat immediately. Make sure it's wrapped in plastic.

8. Even rigorous sexual activity does not burn a significant amount of calories to be considered your daily cardio. This was heartbreaking.

9. Running uptown on the East River Esplanade is superior to running downtown. This actually only applies if you live in the 70s or above, but it was mindblowing for me. I used to live in Murray Hill and running downtown was pretty much the only option.

10. People actually read this blog. Who knew?

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