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My excessive energy, extreme narcissism, and intense love of neon-colored spandex is both managed and fueled by my addiction to fitness. I push myself to extremes and I push other people's buttons. Obviously I needed my own blog.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

The Lost Week(end)

So I've been missing in action in blogging for about a week. The Latino Summit got fun, our plane rides got rowdy, and then somehow the weekend happened. The only thing I have to say for myself is I've learned you shouldn't eat things you find in your friend's couch.

Last Tuesday I did get up for Bikram yoga as I promised. At 4:45 AM my alarm started going off and then my poor roommate thought it was her 7:45 AM alarm and kept trying to turn it off using her password. It was comical and just a little bit sad.

My coworker and I got into a taxi that drove us the 1.8 miles to Bikram Yoga Houston for the 5:30 AM class. I really liked the studio and it was super clean. Bikram has the potential to get gross (i.e. smelly and moldy) real fast and I am all about hypoallergenic studios. We had a great class with Tony (pictured below with us) and I loved hearing his cues in his Texas accent. It made lying on my arms in Locust Pose a lot more pleasant than the New York accents I'm used to hearing. We had just enough time to walk back to our hotel, take ridiculously fast showers, and make it to the Welcome Breakfast.

I cannot explain my face here except to say I had already completed a 90 minute Bikram class by 7 AM.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Casual Post-Work Half

Thursday evening I decided to go for a long run. Yes, I know it was 98 degrees in NYC that day and the low was a whopping 81 degrees. I stocked up on margarita Shot Bloks, which have three times the salt to ward off muscle cramps, Body Glide, and water and headed off to Central Park. 

I went with my Reebok shorts, a Brooks tank, Balega socks, and my red Adrenaline 11s.

Looking skinny if I do say so myself.

I ran the big loop counterclockwise to start. I wanted to pay attention to when I ate my chews and decided that the first mile from my apartment to the park didn't "count" and I would have the first chew at mile 4, which was mile 3 of the park. This made a lot of sense to me at the time because the first mile was my warm up and then two loops are twelve miles and then this would equal a half marathon. In hindsight, I should've brought both packs of Shot Bloks and eaten both of them and screwed this rationing thing. It was hot, my legs felt crampy, and part of me was like, "WTF were you thinking?" The other part was thrilled to be out running.

I made it through the first loop without much ado. I was tired and extremely sweaty, but I felt solid. I turned around to run the second loop clockwise. When I stopped to refill my water bottle for the second time, an ambulance was parked near the Jacqueline Onassis Reservoir. The guy inside looked very close in age to me and he was hooked up to all sorts of machines. The heat is no joke and you need to take care of yourself. I patted myself on the pack for taking precautions like drinking extra water and eating fancy salty sports chews.

I survived 13.1 miles and headed out of the park. By that time, I really had to go to the bathroom so I decided to walk home and not jiggle anything around. But then I also thought it would be a good idea to stop by 7-Eleven and get some cold water and a Green Machine juice. La-dee-da. Walked on home and things were great.

Looking super cute on my walk home.
But then things weren't so great. I started shivering and my stomach was in knots. I walked into my apartment and headed on into the shower. By the time I got out, I was dry heaving. And then there wasn't anything dry about it. Throwing up for 6 hours is not fun.

Staying up until 4 AM because you are throwing up in also not fun.

Leaving work the next day to take a nap and then throwing up your lunch at 8 PM at night is not fun either. This heat has to stop because NY is not intended to have Texas weather. We'd all have central air if it did.

In all seriousness, heat exhaustion is very dangerous and this whole experience was horribly uncomfortable. Make sure you stay hydrated and don't push yourself too hard.

Quickie in Houston

Greetings from Houston! I'm back down in the greatest state in the nation for the Latino Summit. We spend three days exploring our Latino identity and Latino leadership. And yes, I get paid for this.

I got in a quick workout tonight in the hotel gym even though I'm feeling pretty meh. Early flight, limited sleep, lingering stomach troubles, and buffalo chicken rolls aren't really conducive to feelings of awesomeness, but if I am going to be tired and bloated, I might as well not be fat.

I'm in the room getting changed for the gym
while most of my friends are still back at the bar.

Feeling gross is no excuse to lie around like a fat kid.
The gym is on the fifth floor of the JW Marriott and has some nifty views of the Galleria. I love the Galleria; it's one of the most beautiful malls I have ever seen and as a Long Islander, I know my malls.

I did a quick 1.25 mile run on the treadmill, alternating between sprints on an incline, walking on an incline, and running 9ish minute miles (depending on the song.)

You can't tell what this view is of at all in this photo, but take my word for it.

Oh hey. I've been up since 4:45 AM. No worries. I'm solid.
I really wanted to get into the weight room, so after breaking a sweat, I headed over to play with the boys. I started off with some squats with the bar. Had I been alone with more free reign of the gym, I would've experimented with adding weights to it, but three of the guys from my conference were in there, and I decided not to make an ass out of myself. I did three sets. Then I grabbed some weights for presses, bicep curls, and lunges. What I really needed was 15 lbs weights for the presses and curls, but alas, there were only 10s and 20s. I used 10s for the arms and 20s for the lunges.

I did 130 lbs on the leg sled before calling it a night. I was back in my room by 11 PM, which is good because I promised to get up early for yoga tomorrow.

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Weight Loss Wednesday 7.17.13: Early Morning Edition

An Amber Alert went off on my phone at 4 fucking AM this morning and I have been up since. I hate you Apple iOS updates. Obviously the only thing to do was to answer work emails and then take semi nude selfies.

137.8 lbs
I think those shorts might be the most incredibly unflattering shorts ever. It has only taken me 10 months to realize this.
I'm up from last week's 136.4 lbs, but after the weekend I had (s'mores, Chinese food, spinach and artichoke dip, tortilla AND chorizo), I'm lucky I can fit into pants.

Speaking of pants, since I had all this extra time this morning, I tried on my jeans. They are Mossimo Supply Company (Target brand) skinny jeans in size 7 short. Remember, Mossimos are usually in juniors sizes. And yes, 75% of the clothing I wear is from Target. The rest is 20% Calvin Klein and 5% Escada. Just roll with it.

Now you might have noticed that my posts have been lacking sentences such as, "I was throwing up at work to get rid of my hangover," and "Then I woke up drunk and went running," and my personal favorite, "Once I determined who was sleeping next to me, I woke him up for breakfast sandwiches and convinced him not to go to CrossFit." That's because I haven't been drunk in 31 days.

Yes, 31 days. Close your mouth and stop looking so shocked. Back in May I had started assessing the looming train wreck that was my life. What I affectionately called the Wendy Challenge (some of you will get this inside joke) was booked on the calendar from June 16 to July 16. Then early June arrived and my life, as chronicled by my Facebook statuses, became more of a train wreck in motion. The Wendy Challenge changed from being a bet to see if I could avoid alcohol for a month and became a 30 day commitment to living like a semi-adult who made good decisions. Since June 16 I've behaved responsibly. I attended two happy hours where I had a two drink limit. I attended other happy hours and only drank seltzer (who am I?). On the 4th of July, I had 4 drinks THE ENTIRE DAY. I went to a day drinking pool party and kept it under 5 adult beverages. (Granted I did make out with someone significantly younger than I am that day, but hey - College seniors, I keep getting older and they just stay the same.)

I've also gone into the office every single day that I haven't been off or on vacation, even though I don't have to go there to work. I have been at my desk by 6:45 AM more than once and I have not arrived any later than 8:30 AM. I have worn actual professional clothing except for the two times I wore jorts, which was more of a social experiment than a fashion choice. I've worked out at least 4 days a week (usually more) AND started CrossFit. I also ate Chinese food four times without binge eating myself into an MSG-induced coma.

Now that I'm not using my super human powers to function with what should be a debilitating hangover, I have become super productive and hyper efficient. I have also entirely stopped sleeping. Get ready world because I'm not sure you're prepared for In Shape Out of Mind 2.0.

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Dallas in July

I had the brilliant idea to get my entire family to fly to Dallas to visit my sister for her birthday. My exceptional planning skills and habit of Googling random things led to the best birthday weekend ever. Here are some photos.

My parents sharing headphones at baggage claim. Aren't they cute?

My sister at her birthday brunch.

My sister modeling the present I bought her.

My sister's bathroom is larger than my entire apartment. I want a "studio" this size.

Motivating for my morning run.

5 miles in the rain.

A house I saw on my run. I like palm trees.

My insurance company.

Family photo at the George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum

Sisters and the George Bushes

Family photo in the Oval Office replica

The Big D Re-Gals

this photo was NOT posed
We went to the In-Sync Exotics Wildlife Rescue and Education Center in Wylie, Texas. This wonderful organization is dedicated to the rescue of neglected, abused and unwanted exotic felines.

A white lion.

A white female lion named Sheila.

We saw lions, tigers, leopards, servals, mountain lions, bobcats, ocelots, and cheetahs!

S'mores at dinner

I tried to restrain myself when we went for Chinese food.

Hydrating for the flight home.

Monday, July 15, 2013

Road WOD

I'm a sucker for zombies and when I found a Zombie Fitness app, it was only a matter of time (6 seconds) before I had to buy it. It was on sale for 99 cents, which made it even more enticing.

The app has a bunch of zombie and doomsday fitness plans that require rucksacks filled to 1/4 of your body weight, but it also has CrossFit WODs including space to record your best score for Fran, Cindy, Karen, Fight Gone Bad, etc. There's also a section called Road WODs.

Now I tend to travel a reasonable amount each month for both personal and professional reasons, and sometimes both when I can coerce a friend to let me stay with them when I'm in their city for a business trip. The hotel gym, especially during conferences, is packed so I usually go for a run and then pretend to do some arm exercises. It's difficult fitting in a quality run with a packed conference schedule and I always end up rolling into my first session with wet hair or I'm seriously annoyed with my roommate who has decided she is getting out of bed to shower mere seconds before I get back soaking wet with sweat. I spend 60% of every business trip pissed off and scowling in the coffee line.

I'm still at my aunt's in Plano and it's raining again. I didn't want to get my running shoes wet before my flight (hello mildew) and perused the Road WODs instead. I settled on Road WOD 12.

The app has a nifty timer function that includes a stopwatch, a countdown, and a Tabata timer.

I was finished with my workout in 6:36 and I didn't even have to change out of my pajamas. My Sunday Funday t-shirt and sweatshorts obviously made an appearance because I sleep in that shirt every Sunday.

As you can see, all you need is an Oriental rug and a cat to complete this workout.

Henry is telling me to suffer in silence.

Saturday, July 13, 2013

BUTI Fit with Christyn Johnson

My aunt is amazing and arranged for me to take a BUTI class with her personal trainer Christyn Johnson. This morning she put her yoga mat, a towel, bottled water, and me in the car and dropped us all off at Well Help Fitness in Addison, Texas. I met Christyn, put down my mat, and promptly got my ass kicked.

BUTI is a "female-empowerment lifestyle brand" whose "signature movement fuses yoga, tribal dance and plyometrics." Just so you know, BUTI was developed by a former stripper exotic dancer and the signature movements reflect the profession, but if shaking what God gave you equals results, twerk on.

Four of us attended today's class and two of the girls were really good - obviously regulars. We started in a modified lotus pose and warmed up before getting into downward dog. This class is basically yoga for people who are too ADHD for yoga. We jumped in downward dog, we rotated our hips, and we did something called sexy push-ups. From what I gather, sexy push-ups are the same thing as yoga push-ups, which is when you lower into chaturanga, lift up into up dog, push back into downward dog, and repeat. They're killer. I liked that most moves only had 5 reps because you can convince yourself to do 5 of just about anything.

Christyn and me at her studio Well Help Fitness after class
My favorite moves were the based on Warrior 1 and Warrior 2. After getting into those poses, we pulsed and twisted, and some girls may have shimmied but I'm not at that level. It took months for me to get a few dance moves down in Yves' dance fusion class and the shimmy still eludes me.

This entire class targeted my abs and they feel absolutely destroyed right now. I was already sore from the weighted sit-ups and box jumps this week, and this class was exactly what I needed to target my obliques and lower abdominal muscles. And my booty muscles are already sore. I hope that equals perky.

demonstrating my new moves for my mom

I'm pretty much the least sexy person ever, but Christyn and my classmates made me feel welcomed and didn't judge me by my lack of smooth coordination. I know my appeal has something to do with the fact that I look rather sweet and childlike but I'm extremely aggressive and I have a gravelly voice. These attributes don't help one bit when you're attempting to rotate your hips, so I just avoided the mirror and went to town.

Thank you Christyn for having me! I loved it! And if you live in the Dallas area, I highly recommend that you make it to a BUTI class.

Morning Box Jumps

Yesterday I went to CrossFit Central LI for the 7 AM class. I took a long weekend to go to Dallas to visit my sister for her birthday and obviously I capitalized on being out on the Island and headed over to Syosset for my workout. I really like going to CrossFit Central LI and get a little more excited about working out there than at my other CrossFit. I'm not sure why I feel a little guilty admitting that, but it's true.

gratuitous locker room selfie
5 x 2
Hang Power Snatch

Amrap in 20 min.
6 Lunges with Barbell behind neck 105/65
12 Push Press  105/65
18 Box Jumps 24/20

I'm pretty much fresh out of Essentials so I remember learning how to do a hang power snatch with a PVC pipe. CrossFit Central LI does things a little differently and has people jump right into WODs without an Essentials, Foundations, Fundamentals, Elements, On Ramp course. Part of me thinks this is pretty neat, especially because it allows me to drop-in when I want even though I'm not particularly experienced. Personally, I feel a lot more confident going into WODs because I'm like, Ohh, I remember when Jim showed us how to do this.

I used the 15 lbs lady bar and got up to 15 lbs plates, so 45 lbs total for the hang power snatch. Feel pretty good about myself, but since I'm me, I'm dying to get to the day when I get to keep adding weight for each set. Some people are content to run 10Ks. I had to keep going for 50 miles. I tend to subscribe to the bigger is better philosophy - muscles, hair, male anatomy...

I did the first round with 45 lbs, but it was clear that I needed to drop some weight off for the rest and switched to 35 lbs. I probably could've have handled 40 lbs, but I wasn't thinking about combining plates because the workout was being timed. I completed 7 rounds, plus the lunges and 3 presses in 20 minutes. And I also used a 24 inch box because I know I can get up there and I feel no need to shortchange myself because I am a girl.


Friday, July 12, 2013

Take THAT Pinkberry

I enjoy delicious hun-cal fro-yo from time to time, and I am fortunately located near a Pinkberry AND a 16 Handles. Since the college students have descended upon the UES, there are lines out the  door and around block. Has Mad River stopped serving college freshman? I found myself waiting in line for like 27 minutes the other day and after I ran out of things to look at on Instagram, I found myself reading the signage.

This handcrafted signature recipe caught my eye, but then I was like, "Hell no! I am not paying $9 for something I could make at home." I ended up with my usual order (original, kiwi, mango, raspberries, toasted almonds, honey) and a plan to make my own PinkberryGreek.

Oh hey....

You need:
  • FAGE Total 2%
  • grape or cherry tomatoes
  • fresh basil
  • sea salt
  • good balsamic vinegar
  • saucepan
  • sharp knife
I made a balsamic reduction by pouring 1/2 a cup of balsamic vinegar into a saucepan and keeping it on low heat. It takes a while and you need to stir it occasionally. Do not let it boil! Once it won't stop trying to boil, take it off the heat and let it cool. You can store it in the refrigerator for future use.

Slice your tomatoes in half and cut your basil into thick ribbons. I think 8 tomatoes and 2 basil leaves are sufficient for breakfast.

Spoon your Greek yogurt into the bowl, add the tomatoes and basil, and drizzle with balsamic reduction. Top with sea salt.

If you want to prep this at home and eat it at work, slice the tomatoes and basil and put them in a small Ziplock bag. Sprinkle sea salt directly into the bag. Then you can put this together when you get to your office. I keep my balsamic reduction in the fridge in our office kitchen and add it to everything.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Take Your Friend to CrossFit Day

Yesterday my friend Nick, who is finally back from Jordan, came to CrossFit with me. I have been looking forward to this day since he casually mentioned that he would like to drop in when he was in New York and then casually mentioned that that would be in a week. I'm just a wee bit tempted to set up a Google calendar with alerts requesting him to update his whereabouts, but I'm afraid that that might border on super creepy. Regardless, I am thrilled that he is back in the United States.

Anyway, I had all these dreams of amazing photos of us together and how this would be the best post ever because it would be well-documented. But then Nick was late and I prioritize the workout over the photo op. (Sorry Audrey and other "readers" who only look at the pictures.)

I would like to point out that my shorts were longer than Nick's.

Nick was getting one-on-one muscle-up training while
I ran to take stalker photos of him from the upstairs landing.
They didn't come out very well because he wouldn't stop moving. Selfish.


Behind the Neck Snatch Grip Press

Warm Up

5 X 40%
5 X 50%
3 X 60%


3 X 70%
3 X 80%
3 + 90%


3 Rounds for time:
20 Burpees
30 Weighted Ab Mat Sit Ups 45/25
40 Split Jumps

What really happened:

I had really high hopes for myself and took 5 lbs and 10 lbs plates. Once I had dropped down to 2.5 lbs plates, I managed 3 presses before getting the bar stuck on my neck. It was seriously going to stay there for the rest of the day until a guy in the class took pity on me and helped me get it down. I removed the plates and attempted the press with just the bar. This I could do, although not so well. My Good Samaritan kept trying to spot me, but thankfully I didn't need him.

I was super excited for the conditioning portion ALL DAY because I can do burpees, sit ups, and split jumps. Nick and I set our stations up next to each other and I managed to keep in time with him for seven whole burpees. Then he proceeded to crush it and I tried not to be distracted by him. He finished in like eight minutes or something insane like that and then decided to give me encouragement. By encouragement, I mean he told me to "suffer in silence" and to "stop being such a drama queen." Thanks Nick. That was exactly what I wanted to hear.

The last round of burpees were killer, but I think I did them. I know I wasn't launching my body up from the right position, but I did get up. The 25 lbs weighted sit ups weren't as bad as I expected. I slowed down significantly by the end, but part of that was being afraid I was going to drop it on my head. A guy in the 4 PM class did that and it looked like it hurt. I no repped the first 11 split jumps in my final round because I knew I wasn't getting low enough. I completed 40 real ones, even if my legs were pretty wobbly at the end. I finished in 11:52 and for the very first time I was able to write (RX) after my name on the board. Fuck yeah.

After some quick showers (where I was dressed and ready to go way before Nick even had his pants buttoned), we stopped by my office so I could drop off my gym stuff and pick up my purse parade Nick around my floor and introduce him to my friends. We don't get many tall, attractive, muscular, straight men over here in education non-profit land. Sure, we've got some folks that fit some of the criteria but I'm pretty sure I've never seen a guy with all four. I am SHAMELESS.

Nick told me he's going back to CrossFit tonight and wanted to know if I wanted to go, but obviously, since it's Thursday, I am going to happy hour.
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