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My excessive energy, extreme narcissism, and intense love of neon-colored spandex is both managed and fueled by my addiction to fitness. I push myself to extremes and I push other people's buttons. Obviously I needed my own blog.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Companies that Should Sponsor In Shape Out of Mind

So I survived my first long run since the Brooklyn Marathon and I woke up feeling great. I guess it only takes 15.5 miles to pound out a case of the neurotic doldrums.

My coworker was telling me about how many of her husband's friends are athletes (mostly triathletes), and that one guy is sponsored by Odwalla. I think a company should sponsor me. The following companies would be suitable (listen up PR) and they probably aren't sponsoring any other runners.

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Dewar's
My go-to drink is a double Dewar's white label, two ice cubes. I've carbo-loaded many a race with my beverage of choice. I even knocked one back before heading to the subway for the Governor's Island 10K.

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Phillip Morris
I've been a longtime customer of this tobacco company. I've been smoking Parliament Lights since 2004 (except when I briefly quit). Before that, I smoked Marlboro 27s and when I started smoking, I smoked Marlboro Reds. A tobacco company sponsoring a runner might seem insane, but I'm probably the only runner who'd be totally okay running in a P-Funk Light jersey.

I think people mistake the scent for my perfume.

TRESemmé
Every day starts with TRESemmé. I don't like to shower in the morning (I shower right before bed and wake up with supersweet bedhead), so I dampen the front on my hair and then spray a bristle brush with hair spray and brush the front pieces before wrapping the rest of my mane into a bun while it sets. I pull the hair-tie out later and viola. If the weather is inclement, I bust out the Climate Control spray. If my hair is particularly dirty looking, I use the dry shampoo spray. Then I tease my hair and add more hairspray. My best running hair-dos involve teasing and hairspray. Being athletic is no excuse to look like a beast.

Are any of my reader's sponsored? Tell us what it's like.

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