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My excessive energy, extreme narcissism, and intense love of neon-colored spandex is both managed and fueled by my addiction to fitness. I push myself to extremes and I push other people's buttons. Obviously I needed my own blog.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Shut Up and Jump! - Family Skydiving Trip

We went skydiving in celebration of my sister's 21st birthday. Nothing says, "You can legally drink" like jumping from an airplane at 10,000 feet and freefalling with a man strapped to your back for sixty seconds. This is allegedly part of my birthday present as well, but no professional skydiver sang to me or wished me a happy birthday so let's see about that next month.

We scheduled our skydiving extravaganza with Long Island Skydiving Center in East Moriches, New York. East Moriches is located on the eastern end of Long Island. There are directions on the website. My sister, my mom, and I got in the car at 11:30am, as planned, and then realized that my father was no where to be found. We awkwardly remained in the car in the driveway for thirty-seven minutes while we waited for him to return. This is not the first time something of this nature has happened. Clearly something is the matter with him... and with us. Eventually we were on our way out east.

You don't just arrive at a skydiving place, sign your life away, and take off in a plane. There's a lot of waiting involved, but there is much entertainment to enjoy while you wait. First you have to watch a video of a man that looks like a white Osama bin Laden informing you of the joys and dangers of skydiving. Then you initial a bunch of forms. Then the staff videotapes you reading a statement that says you realize you are voluntarily risking your life and and no one is making you jump out of a plane, and that you might (probably?) die and you promise you won't sue them from the afterlife. Only then are you allowed out of the trailer (yup, the trailer) and permitted into the tented yard. The family gathered at one of the picnic tables where we proceeded to viciously make fun of all of the other people waiting to jump from the sky. We also ate hot dogs from the roadside stand.

Where's the candy?

About an hour passed before it was our turn to get into the rapist van and drive to the hanger. An unfortunately-shaped woman named Martha and her boyfriend also got in the van. Martha was jumping to celebrate her 29th birthday. Martha is from Connecticut.




Once at the hanger, we met a bunch of cool people who jump out of planes for a living. We got strapped into our harnesses, waited around some more, and then met our skydiving instructors. My sister was going to jump with Jarred and I was going to jump with Joe. We maneuvered ourselves into a small plane, and then the pilot took off. We had an incredible view of West Hampton Beach and Fire Island. Joe gave us a nice guided tour as we circled around. The flight is eighteen minutes long, just enough time to forget what you're doing up there, and then it's time to jump!


My sister had requested (loudly demanded) that she go first. Jarred hooked himself onto her harness, opened the door, and then they were gone! I wasn't nervous about jumping (mostly because I refused to think about it), until I felt the rush of cold air and saw my sister disappear from an airplane. Joe has hooked himself onto me by this time, and he's telling me to move towards the front of the plane. I have to do this on my knees (keep the dirty jokes to yourself, thank you) and the cold air is rushing in my face, and I'm thinking that maybe this wasn't the best idea. Joe puts his leg out onto the ledge, I put my leg out onto the ledge, I cross my arms, Joe crosses his over mine, and then we jump!




Are we there yet?

I think I closed my eyes at first. We are plummeting towards the earth. It takes me a moment to realize what is going on, but then I remember and it is the coolest feeling ever. I can see the ocean, and the beach, and people's backyards, and their pools. It is awesome. My favorite part was the free fall, and I could have done without the long parachute landing. I was more concerned about landing in a tree than falling and dying. I've seen that tree impaling episode of Grey's Anatomy and it does not seem like a pleasant experience. After what seemed like forever, we got closer to the ground, and I lifted my legs, basically making my body into a right angle. We had a safe and simple landing, and I waited to put my feet down until Joe instructed me to. It's your instinct to put your feet down as you approach, but you can break your ankles this way. Since I have marathon training to do and races to run, Joe didn't have to tell me twice to keep my legs up until the very end. We had a great day. Best birthday celebration ever! Woo!

4 comments:

  1. This is great! Jenny and I are chickens and would never do this. How come you look so good in all that gear? You should model it. ;)

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  2. this gives me hope! my boyfriend desperately wants to jump from a plane and i didn't think I'd be that scared- I still don't. In fact you look a bit bored there..

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  3. Olivia, You are too kind. The gear gave me a major wedgie - enough so that the guy who grabbed the parachutes upon my landing called me the Wedgie Queen.

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  4. Jenny, Definitely do it! It's awesome. It's not that scary and it's safer than riding a rollercoaster or driving a car. Your boyfriend and you should go this summer. I bet it would be very romantic.

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