Fetch the Ech

In an effort to bond with my mother, I attempted to watch The Bachelor with her this evening. I made it through five minutes before spitting up a piece of my sandwich and being forced to evacuate the premises. While I've lost five minutes of my life and many more brain cells, I was struck by an incredible idea: I should have my own dating show!


So here's my pitch. Twenty-five guys are gathered to fight for my affections. At the end of the first episode they are challenged to President Clinton's fitness test, and anyone who can't run a sub-7 mile is booted off. I mean honestly. I was able to run a 7 mile at a pack a day and I've got body fat. Each week the remaining contestants and I go on fitness-related dates, which show off my likes and abilities. We can run along the river, go to kickboxing, book bikes next to one another in studio cycling, and even do a little Zumba. The viewers get to see me in my spandex, and I might actually remember the names of the guys I'm out and about with. It's a win-win situation!

If you would like to see Fetch the Ech on a channel near you, please contact anyone you know who is in reality tv. If Snookie and Brett Michaels and Flava Flav got their chance at television love, I should too.

Running as a Rest Day

I really cannot stand to sit still. I have a lot of restless energy and if I don't put it towards something active, I end up wrecking havoc on others and stirring up trouble. Today I should have been relaxing, or working on lesson plans and my class play, but instead I was pacing around the house. I did spend some time painting scenery, but it was just too nice out to stay inside. I decided I needed a polish change anyway, and set out for a little run to the nail salon. I added a loop around the cul-de-sac and had a nice 2.5 mile route (according to the Nike+ GPS app). I don't feel like I worked out per se, but at least I can sit still long enough to type this and have calmed my mind down. Those tree stumps aren't going to paint themselves.

Whey Protein

I drink protein shakes to help me get enough protein in my diet. Sometimes I'll have one for breakfast, usually before a morning workout. I don't really like to drink my breakfast if I'm going to work (although I'm almost always willing to drink my dinner, work or no work). I also like a shake as a snack or a post-workout recovery meal.

I've been using Designer Whey products since last April. I like the chocolate flavor a lot. I also use the natural flavor in fruit smoothies.

Which whey powder have you been using? Do you have a favorite flavor?

☮ ♥ DISCO

Tripp Doherty's studio cycling classes are one hour of inspirational anecdotes, great music, and high fives. Tripp's shirt today said ☮ ♥ DISCO, and this pretty much sums up the magical hour with the addition of classic rock, current rock, techno, and Lady Gaga. I went to a few of Tripp's classes in 2007 when he was just added to the Roslyn Equinox schedule. I liked his style but I returned back to college and that was that.

Last Monday I attended one of Tripp's classes at the Great Neck Equinox and I was hooked. I was having kind of a crummy day, not because it was Valentine's Day even though it was, and I wanted to just go home and eat crap in front of the television. Somehow I convinced myself to go workout, and it was the best workout I've had in a long time. I just felt awesome in the studio and for the rest of the night. I burned 722 calories in that hour! When Mumford & Sons "The Cave" came on I wasn't sure if I was sweating, crying, or close to dying but I knew I was thankful that I could get my body to do that when some people are bedridden. I don't know how Tripp does this, but he gets you to be grateful that your legs and lungs are on fire.

I have been bitten by the studio cycling bug (and I saved a ton of money this weekend when I was too sick to go anywhere or do anything) so I treated myself to these beautiful shoes.

These are the Shimano SH-WM61 Mountain Bike shoe and they are hot. They are black, white, and a light glacial blue. I have been planning many workout outfits around them. I'm not sure if I was more distracted by the hotness of my new shoes today, or the hotness of the Equinox sales rep moving the erg machine during class. Apparently the supergoodlooking employees work at Woodbury. Who knew?

Woodbury has gone under a major renovation since last summer. It went from being the underappreciated step-child of Long Island Equinoxes, to quite the spiffy gym. There is a new cycling studio, a more user-friendly floor space, and new showers. I'm not into long showers but I must've stayed in there for nearly twenty minutes. The water pressure was pretty heavenly.

1 Dumbbell + 7 Moves = Oxygen's Total-Body Workout

Oxygen Magazine's March issue has a great total-body workout on p. 39 that I tried today. All you need is one dumbbell to complete all 7 moves.

Exercises

1. Dumbbell wood chop (low to high)
- This move works your legs, core, shoulders, back and chest.

2. Squat (dumbbell held at chest height)
- This moves works your quads, glutes, calves, and hamstrings.

3. Biceps curl (one arm at a time)
- This moves works your biceps and forearms.

4. Triceps overhead extension
- This moves works your triceps and forearms.

5. Chest press (one arm at a time)
- This moves works your chest, shoulders, triceps, cores.

6. Crunch (weight held on chest)
- This moves works your abdominals.

7. Shoulder press (one arm at a time)
- This moves works your front delts and lateral delts.

I used a 12.5 lb dumbbell. The magazine says to do each exercise for 15 reps, then rest before repeating the seven moves. Let me know how you liked this routine if you try it. (Let's get some posting going. I feel unloved!)

Should Have Went with the Slurpee

So maybe it wasn't the best idea to drink until midnight and then get up at 5:15 for work. The best hangover cure is a Slurpee, but I went with some Vita Coco coconut water (tangerine flavored) and headed out to Brooklyn. I had a successful day, with only minimal binge-eating. On the drive back to Long Island I was feeling surprisingly good, and a little ashamed about the side of basmati rice I had with my 1,000 calorie salad, so I drove to the Great Neck Equinox for kickboxing.

Assia covered tonight's class and it was awesome. I held my own despite the pain in my knee, the pain in my foot, and the pain in my head. I even managed the plyo work although I could taste tequilla shots 1 and 2, and I think a black and tan came back to say hello. Damn Taco Taco margarita pitchers... they cloud your judgment and suddenly your reliving Cabo Spring Break 2006 (minus the balcony hot tub, off-label painkillers, and barefoot runs through the street.)

I sweated out all the toxins and I was impressed that not only did I haul my ass to the class, I stayed for all 60 minutes. I was on top of the world for about eleven minutes, and then my lunch came back to haunt me. And my snack. And I think I might've seen my breakfast. The verdict is out on kickboxing as a hangover cure, but I do feel accomplished. Maybe I should've treated myself to the Slurpee.

If You Can't Be With The One You Love, Love The One You're With

Or at least try to tolerate them. Yves is on vacation! He definitely deserves it because he works incredibly hard, but his loyal fitness followers miss him desperately. Yesterday, against my better judgement, I went to kickboxing with a substitute. Dana was covering the class, and she is a great instructor, but she is no Yves. It's true. She even said it herself. The class was actually pretty good but you could tell that our hearts weren't really in it.

I didn't enjoy the class because my knee was killing me. I don't know how or why it got like this, but last week I noticed a throbbing, and sometimes piercing pain in my right knee. I am very concerned because if I can't workout someone is going to die. This is my stress reliever. I am an OCD/ADD person who spends the day with lots of loud, small children. Exercise is essential. I'll probably be forced to take up swimming and the chlorine will destroy my hair and I will be devastated and ugly.

Yves will be back for his Friday classes. Hooray! You should also try Dana's Zumba classes, which are offered at both the Roslyn and Woodbury Equinoxes.

Dear Mom, Please Come Home

Today's Lunch Menu

• Left-over steamed Brussels sprouts (like really Mom?)
• Pear
• Sargento cheese stick (only 50 calories!)
• Gluten-free oatmeal cookie (55 calories and made by Glenny's. Tastes pretty good.)
• Chocolate swirl jell-o (sugar-free, 60 calories. I don't remember what real jell-o tastes like so it tastes good to me.)

 

You Want Privacy and I've Got to Pee

Have you noticed that whenever you desperately need to use the bathroom, there is always a line in the ladies locker room? I drink a lot of water - at least 3 liters a day. I easily chug a liter on the drive to the gym after school, and sometimes traffic keeps me on the Jackie Robinson for 40 minutes. Once I get to Equinox I'm beelining for the bathroom.

Yesterday, as usual, I had to wait because women were changing in the stalls. Really? Talk about selfish. This is the gym. It's where people go to improve their bodies. Of course people are judging you, but to be honest, no one really cares what you look like getting changed except for you. I probably wouldn't even notice you. But now you have my attention because you made me wait... You're not that fat. Get over yourself and get changed by the lockers like a normal person. And I'm always surprised that the really fat people don't get stuck while shimmying their fat bodies into spandex in such tight places.

Stalls are made for using the toilet. Learn to love yourself and change in front of everyone else. Otherwise I'm going to call you out on it and make you cry.

Grounded During Intro to Flight

My most favorite fitness friend is finally back from LA. I'm not pleased that he decided to move out there... at all. So Rylan returned and invited me to attend a yoga workshop focusing on inverted poses with him at Pure Yoga East. I have desperately wanted to be able to do a handstand since last summer. I wouldn't have signed up to go alone, but I figured I could handle a little humiliation with a buddy.

The two-hour workshop, entitled Intro to Flight (red flag anyone?), was taught by Dice Iida-Klein and Briohny Smyth. These two awesomely talented instructors teach at Black Dog Yoga, Yoga Works, amd Equinox gyms in California. They're like Rylan's Yves Maco... he's willing to travel to attend their special classes. Now if instructors are good enough for Rylan, they are good enough for me. Last Spring Rylan convinced me to go to Bikram yoga with him, and while I was uncomfortable and frustrated, I'm glad I went. That's exactly how I feel after this experience.

I could barely do ANY of the poses. I even struggled with the downward dogs. My shoulders were tight from Thursday night's kickboxing class and I was having trouble straightening my arms. If this doesn't tell me I need to consistently practice yoga, I'm not sure what does. Dice and Bri were very patient with me, even though I was a disgrace to my yoga mat, and I learned a lot about balance that I (hopefully) can put into practice at a later date.

Pure Yoga East is a beautiful facility. It's run by the same people who brought us Equinox, however the showers aren't stocked with Khiel's. If you're interested in a yoga studio, check this place out.

Pure Yoga East
86th Street & 3rd Avenue

The Ugly Thing in the Freezer

I bought fresh ginger root the last time I went to the Fairway store and it's been sitting in my parents' refrigerator ever since. I transferred it to the freezer a few days ago to keep it fresh longer. This morning I decided to use my Ninja Master Prep to make a ginger protein smoothie. After some brief Internet research, I determined that the frozen pineapple chunks residing next to my father's candy bar collection would be a nice addition to the ginger root. Skim milk, natural flavored Designed Whey, honey, and ice would complete the ingredients list. 

So I head downstairs and attempt to peel the frozen ginger. Easier said than done. I had read that freezing the ginger would make it easier to peel, but maybe the words peel and grate were interchanged incorrectly. I wasn't going to bother to grate the ginger because I have a Ninja. That thing turns ice into snow! What do I need a grater for? After almost scraping off the top three layers of my finger (twice), I had 3g (about the size of a die) of ginger, 1/3 cup frozen pineapple chunks (46g), 4 oz of skim milk, 1 scoop of whey, and 10g of honey in the blender with 6 cubes of ice. I am pleasantly surprised by this tasty smoothie and it's only 196 calories. The ginger adds a little spiciness to the tart pineapple, and compliments the honey. 

I drink my smoothies and shakes out of BlenderBottle®. This container has a patented BlenderBall® whisk that helps mix your ingredients together. I use it in two ways - sometimes I pour protein powder and a liquid (milk, water, almond milk) into and shake, and sometimes I pour whatever I blended in the Ninja into it and the BlenderBall® keeps the smoothie frothy.

The Luke Perry Effect

Today I was discussing my opinions on ADD medications with my kickboxing friends in the locker room, and I happened to mention that I didn't start taking my Ritalin until I was twenty. One of the women who had joined in the conversation looks at me and asks how old I am. I tell her and she exclaims that I don't look a day over fifteen. I get this a lot, and I know I look young, especially in a pair of shorts and a sports bra (it's my exceptionally well-endowed chest that gives me my youthful look), but really? Fifteen?

For the record, I am twenty-four. Coincidentally this is the age Luke Perry was when he began his role as Dylan McKay on Beverly Hills, 90210. His character was supposed to be sixteen. America's perception of age was radically changed once this sexy "teenager" began entering our homes on a weekly basis. The Luke Perry Effect explains why many twenty-something-year-olds are routinely mistaken for children. If you work with children, this can be a major problem. I was once hall passed on my way to the bathroom. Not cool Mr. Hall Monitor. No wonder you don't have any friends.

Luke Perry is not the only actor to play a role almost a decade younger than his actually age. His co-star Gabrielle Carteris, better known as Andrea Zuckerman, was twenty-nine when the series started. Stockard Channing played high school student Rizzo in Grease when she was thirty-three. The T-Birds look old enough to have illegitimate grandchildren running around Rydell High. And let's remember that the twenty-something-year-old cast of One Tree Hill got fed up with basketball championships and suddenly the time continuum when into hyperdrive and everyone was out of college and back in Tree Hill. The strange thing is that we recognize and accept that these other characters are played by people who aren't really teenagers, but no one seems to question why Dylan had crows feet before he even took the SAT. (Granted he took it later than most of his friends, but what do you expect from a guy who had to visit his father in prison on Saturdays to discuss literature?) 

What was it about Luke Perry as Dylan McKay? Maybe it was the pompadour that never seemed to move no matter how fast he drove his Porsche over to the Walshes'.

It Could've Been a Word Document like Creed's

I've recently received a bunch of emails and Facebook messages from In Shape Out of Mind readers telling me how much they enjoy the posts. Thank you so much for your support! I began this blog simply because my mother told me she didn't want to hear about my gym classes anymore. I figured if I couldn't annoy her with tales about kickboxing and my quest for the perfect crosstrainers, I could tell an imaginary audience about the things I find interesting and important in the fitness industry.

In Shape Out of Mind now has a real audience, which is awesome. I appreciate all the feedback you've sent because now that I know people are reading this thing, I want to provide you with the content you want. Please keep sending messages and leaving posts!

Best Workout for Flat Abs... and No Crunches Required

I once had really flat abs... now I have solid abdominal muscles nestled under a fine layer of cupcake-created blubber. It's okay. I might be fat now, but give me two months and I'll be golden. You should be working on your abs even if you still have fat to lose. The most effective way I have found to train my abs has been... wait for it... dance class. No joke. I love Yves Maco's Dance Fusion classes because 1. I get to embrace my inner hip hop video backup dancer and 2. it's so much fun I forget how hard I am working.

Today I let my tangled mess of sweaty hair down (I had already kickboxed for an hour) and put on my badass dancer face. You really have to see it, because any description wouldn't do it justice. If you ever saw the scowl I used to make while ripping butts out of my Saab window on Vernon Street, (I was the girl wearing Wayfarers and too much pearl jewelry), then you can begin to imagine the badass dancer face. I have been dancing with Yves for almost a year now and I have made significant improvement. I still struggle at the beginning of each class, but after about 10 minutes I have fully transformed into my dancer persona, and then you should see how I shake it. You can actually. It's on the video. I'm way in the back.

My core still feels engaged and I'm just standing around typing. I'm going to find it difficult to get out of bed tomorrow morning. The last time I went to Dance Fusion I had to grasp my sheets and start rocking back and forth until I gathered the momentum to sit up. Sadly, there is no video of that.